Hi everyone! Dr. Desiree Howell here. I wanted to ask a question, see what you all thought, and share a little bit of my thoughts on the question, is burnout a badge of honor? Would you consider being burned out almost like a badge of honor?

Capitalism Rewards Overworking

Now I know that might sound strange to some folks especially if you think about for the most part, how awful being burned out feels and how draining and exhausting and hopeless it can feel. But I'm asking, because I'm just thinking about how society, especially Western society, capitalist societies, really reward overworking, really reward perfectionism in a way. And if burnout is about, you know, pushing yourself too hard or working too much does it almost make it seem like burnout is, ah, you've done capitalism right, or something, right? You, you were a good worker or kind of any of those values of pushing yourself to the brink of, you know, self sacrifice of giving it your all.

No Stigma for Overworking

I realized that this language is, is pretty blaming, right? If the idea of that you're burned out because you pushed too hard or you didn't set boundaries, or you couldn't say no. And I will definitely address that in another video, but I do not believe that burnout is personally your fault. But it just strikes me as interesting that I have found different folks feeling, I guess, less stigmatized or not having a problem sharing that they're burned out. And I'm not saying that any mental health concerns should be stigmatized or that anyone should feel ashamed of anything they're going through. It just seems that the folks I've interacted with have had an easier time sharing, Hey, I've been burned out or I'm burnt out right now, than maybe sharing other disorders. I feel like the stigma is reducing for sure with anxiety. I'm not so sure about depression or other concerns. But I'm just curious about that. There's a part that it's almost like, A+, gold star student, if you say that you're a perfectionistic or workaholic.

Proud of How Much I Could Handle

I know when I was in the middle of my burnout that a part of me felt like, “Wow, I was able to handle a lot. I had three jobs and a family.” It did feel a little bit like, “Oh, I guess I'm being a good worker. I'm being a hard worker. I'm sacrificing for my family, I'm doing things right. I'm playing by society's rules. I'm trying to follow the American dream and be a part of the status quo.” Work a lot of jobs, try my best with my kids try to pay the bills, try to pay off debt, cut corners with budgeting. So there was definitely a part of me during burnout that was like, I'm doing what society rewards, but I'm still feeling empty and I'm not living my values. So it's just, it's interesting. I don't personally feel like it's a badge of honor, but it does feel like it's rewarded. What does it mean if you're burned out because you did what society says to do? It’s just an interesting paradox.

I Couldn’t Hack It

So I'm super curious what you all think about that? The phrase or the question is burnout, a badge of honor. Does that somehow mean you did things right? But then in a way it definitely could be flipped because then I feel like someone could argue if you were doing it right, you wouldn't have gotten burned out. But that is unsustainable! We are humans, not machines! There definitely could be feelings of failure. When I closed some of my businesses and stopped doing some of my side hustles and I left my full-time job, there was definitely fear and shame that I couldn't hack it. I didn't have what it takes. I somehow wasn't strong enough or good enough to be able to have, three jobs, a partner, and two children as a highly sensitive empath and introvert. I wouldn't have gotten burnt out if somehow I had more self care routines or something. Ridiculous!

Society Creates the Conditions for Burnout

But all that just feels really judging. And I'm here to say that it's definitely not your fault that society was set up in a way that it only serves certain folks. And so I'm curious what you all think about the phrase is burnout, some kind of a badge of honor, especially as compared to kind of going through other sort of mental health concerns. Take care everyone!